Brightline team
Aug 12, 2024
Unfinished assignments. Missed due dates. Unread books. Messy backpacks and misplaced paperwork.
If you have a child with ADHD, the list above might describe your days and weeks from September to June. And these might be just a few of the frustrations your ADHD child (and you) are trying to overcome.
In this article, we’ll discuss:
Why homework is a struggle for kids with ADHD
How ADHD affects homework through the years
Seven specific strategies to try
When to bring Brightline in for support
Why is homework such a struggle for kids with ADHD?
The homework struggle is real for all kids and for a variety of reasons. Kids who have ADHD may have an even harder time settling in, staying focused, and getting the work done. And you might be as frustrated as they are, especially when you see them doing things they love (like playing video games) without any trouble focusing.
It’s not that kids with ADHD don’t want to do well. They aren’t being lazy or actively trying to annoy you. Everyone’s resources run dry at some point, and your child is no exception. Consider that they:
Might shake their legs or bounce in their chair because the mandatory (unappealing) task has drained their dopamine, which then creates a dip in body movement control
Don’t see a goal or reward in sight, so they feel no motivation to focus
Are low on impulse control, so simple distractions win the focus fight (even watching the grass grow is more fun than dividing fractions!)
Have worked hard to focus all day at school, and that cognitive overload plus the distractions at home make their continued focus an impossibility
And when they say they simply don’t want to do the work, it’s not meant to drive you crazy — they’re just being honest. What else might make getting homework done difficult? It could be that your child has a hard time:
Remembering what they’ve read or studied
Focusing in and staying interested in the work for extended periods
Managing their time well enough to finish several assignments
Slowing down and working correctly rather than rushing through
Controlling their impulses and desires to do something other than the work
Feeling confident that they can do it right
ADHD and homework through the years
When your child is younger, they probably don’t have tons of homework to get through. But this is a great time to get your child used to a flexible homework framework that can grow with them. It’s also a good time for you to get really familiar with approaches that work, what doesn’t, and how you can help them find success to build upon.
You can help your child start to build expectations in their brain. For example, you might say that every day from 4-4:30pm is “focus time” whether they have homework or not. Setting a timer and completing a necessary task every day during that time slot can build an expectation. Over time, that can make it easier for your child to find the focus they need.
If your child is older — like in middle or high school — and they haven’t found their homework groove yet, know that it’s never too late. Your role is to support your child where they are today, and release the pressure on the both of you that builds when you think about where you want them to be. As your child grows up, you can involve them in the solutions put into place, and they can tell you what else they need as they move from grade to grade.
Seven specific strategies to try
There are practical steps you can take to help create an environment that helps your child thrive, build confidence, and feel successful, no matter what age or grade they’re in. Depending on their age and unique needs, you may want to try one at a time. (Or, partner with someone at Brightline who understands exactly what you’re going through and can help you create a personalized plan that will work for your child.)
Here are the seven strategies:
Build routines that include two important elements:
Breaks: If your child has a lot of homework, think about how much work at one time your child is truly capable of doing today (not what you think or wish they could handle). Based on that, try breaking the homework session into smaller “chunks”. Say something like “Let’s set a timer for 15 minutes. When it dings, we’ll set another timer for a five-minute break. We’ll do that cycle three times today.” Knowing they can work in short bursts can help them find their focus, and knowing they have a timed break between sessions helps them really take advantage of that free zone. If you’re working with Brightline on this approach, we’ll use a pacing strategy to make small improvements over time. And as your child grows up and their brains develop, you’ll see some natural progress as well.
Movement: Movement is magic! Getting enough exercise is key for kids with ADHD. If you can, give your child a chance to move their body after school — running, dancing, hopscotch, yoga, and riding a bike all count. That physical break can act as a buffer between an at-school work session and the at-home work session, giving them time to refocus.
Track progress visually: Having a visual (a digital clock, analog timer, or an hourglass) can help a child with ADHD see that 15 minutes isn’t “forever” and that it actually goes by pretty fast. You can also track their progress visually with a colorful checklist on the desk or wall. They can check the boxes as they go and feel the satisfaction of getting it done. (Note: Every child is unique. For some, visual trackers can halt progress, rather than help, especially if there is another diagnosis like OCD or anxiety.)
Prep the environment: Experiment with different approaches and then adjust based on what seems to help your child get their work done, as opposed to what they say they like. (They may love music but it can also be a distraction — offer to play the song during the next break instead.)
If you can dedicate a work space (with things like phones, books, toys, and other distractions out of sight) it can help them focus.
Some kids with ADHD have an easier time clearing a busy mind when they know the time for homework vs. time to relax. Having lines drawn helps reduce guilt or confusion around what they should be doing and when.
Music can help some kids focus, while others might be bothered by even light conversation happening in the background.
Meet your child’s sensory needs: There are lots of creative ways to get work done — and they don’t all include sitting still in a chair. A weighted lap pad or blanket might help them feel grounded and be the physical stimuli they need to focus. A standing desk, yoga ball chair (for bouncing), or chair band for foot tapping allows movement during homework. Even practicing Spanish vocabulary or spelling while on a homework swing or a trampoline counts! Being flexible helps you meet your child’s movement needs while they work on focus and attention.
Ask for back up: Let’s face it — sometimes parents or caregivers aren’t a child’s favorite person. If your child has a beloved babysitter, older cousin, or tutor, try to enlist their help for study time. Your child might think it’s way cooler to work on math or history with them once a week than it is with boring old you. (And let’s be honest, it’s a nice break for you, too.)
Give your expectations a reality check: You might be a neurotypical adult with adult abilities and expectations. Your child — while wonderful and full of potential — is not a neurotypical adult. Make some adjustments. You may need to:
Adopt realistic expectations and an understanding of the challenges of ADHD. Doing this will help you stay more regulated and reduce challenges around homework time (often a huge source of tension and conflict).
Monitor your words: How you talk about or label your child’s abilities — both to them and to others — matters.
Avoid focusing on the fidgety behavior that annoys you if they’re still doing the work while moving around.
Release what you think they should be doing, let them show you what they’re able to do, and start there.
Support the structure that works best for your child and let them put in the effort with your help. You’ll gradually be able to pull pieces of the framework away over time as your child starts to experience success.
Admit you can’t or don’t want to do it alone: See below.
Let Brightline help: Watching your child struggle and not understanding why or how to help can be frustrating for everyone involved. It can take a lot of patience and effort on your part to support them in the ways they need you to. But it doesn’t have to be a never-ending fight. When you and your child work with a Brightline therapist, it can help you recognize that with ADHD, the desire to succeed is there, it’s the ability to apply that motivation that can be elusive. Creating a personalized plan that has been proven to work for neurodiverse kids — one that has a positive impact on your child — is just one way we can support your family. Talk to us about how one of our coaching programs or therapy can help.
It’s never too early to set your child up for success — and handling homework is one great place to start. Get in touch with Brightline today.
